Monk Judge Ethan Rickover: You're going to kill a federal judge?
Monk: Tonight, I'm the judge.

Grim amp Evil Fred Fredburger: (About Wiggy Jiggy Jed's hat) Hey, can I try on that hat? I think it's important. I think it's important that I try on the hat, because...
Judge Roy Spleen: What is wrong with you?!
Fred Fredburger: Judge?
Judge Roy Spleen: No, shut up!
Fred Fredburger:...Judge?
Judge Roy Spleen: Shut up!
Fred Fredburger: Judge?
Judge Roy Spleen: I ORDER YOU TO SHUT UP!!
Fred Fredburger: Judge?
Judge Roy Spleen: WHY WON'T YOU SHUT UP?!?!?! (Silence)
Fred Fredburger:...Judge? (Judge Roy Spleen finally gives in and he gives Fred the hat)
Fred Fredburger: Yes.

Blue Heelers Amy: You are not my judge, PJ! No one is my judge!
PJ: Judge of what?

Arrested Development [Gob is using a "My name is Judge" magazine insert inside his ventriloquist dummy]
Gob: They'll call me up on the stand, say something like "who is this little friend?", and he'll say...
Franklin/Judge: My name is Judge.
Gob: Whose name is Judge?
Franklin/Judge: My name is...
Gob: That's a silly name!
Michael: That's enough!
Franklin/Judge:...Judge. My name...
Gob: Yes, I am judging your name. It am silly!
Franklin/Judge:...Is...
Gob: Oh, now you're correcting my grammar?
Michael: Gob, not going to put Franklin on the stand. And your lips are moving just a little bit.
Franklin/Judge:...Judge.
Gob: He's right, his name is Judge now.

What's Up, Doc Hugh: Don't touch me, I'm a doctor.
Judge Maxwell: Of what?
Hugh: Music.
Judge Maxwell: Can you fix a hi-fi?
Hugh: No, sir.
Judge Maxwell: Then shut up!

All the President's Men Judge: Will you please state your professions.
Barker: Anti-communists.
Judge: Anti-communists? That, sir, is not your average profession. Your name, please.
McCord: James McCord.
Judge: Will you step forward, sir? And what is your occupation, Mr. McCord?
McCord: Security consultant.
Judge: Where?
McCord: Government, uh, recently, uh, retired.
Judge: Where in the government?
McCord: Central Intelligence Agency.
Judge: Where?
McCord: The C.I.A.
Woodward: Holy shit.

Addams Family, The Judge: [after a golf ball crashes through his window] Damn you, Addams!
Gomez: Sorry about the window, Judge. Keep the ball, I have a whole bucket full!
Judge: You moron!

Producers, The 2005 Judge: And who might you be, my dear?
Ulla: Ulla Inga Hansen Bensen Yonsen Tallen-Hallen Svaden-Svanson... Bloom.
Judge: You're HIS wife?
Ulla: He wouldn't do it unless we got married!
Judge: What a schmuck!

Shaggy Dog, The Judge Whittaker: Mr. Douglas! Did you just growl at the opposing council?
Dave: No. I need some water.
Judge Whittaker: Do you need a brief recess?
Dave: No thanks. I just-- (growls at Judge Whittaker)
Judge Whittaker: Did you just growl at me?
Dave: No, I had something caught in my throat. (growls at Judge Whittaker again, then drinks some water)
Judge Whittaker: One more outburst and I'm holding you in comtempt.
Dave: (barks) Silence! Quiet! Whoo! I think I could use a brief re--re...
Judge Whittaker: Re-ecess. (bangs gavel) Ten minutes.

Grim amp Evil Fred: Uh Judge, where are the nachos?
Judge Roy Spleen: There aren't any nachos!
Fred: Oh, then, where are the hot dogs?
Judge: There are no hot dogs!
Fred: Pizza?
Judge: No!
Billy: Tacos?
Fred: I like tacos!
Judge Roy Spleen: (Bashes Billy and Mandy together) Don't encourage him!