Top Gear Jeremy: I'm now driving my car of many colours, and many cylinders, into Jordan. A country famous for not having Bethlehem in it.

Thirteen Tracy Freeland: No, no, no, Mom! Get off of me. I hate you. Stop!
Melanie Freeland: [holds Tracy's face] I love you. I love you and your brother more than anything in the world. And I'll die for you, but I won't leave you alone right now.
Tracy Freeland: Mason said you want me to move in with Dad [pushes Melanie away] You don't want me here. You don't want me...
Melanie Freeland: [hugs Tracy from behind] I want your Dad to be in your life more. I want you here with me. You're my heart. I'll make it right.
Tracy Freeland: It can never be right.

What I Like About You Val: I can choose to be happy, it's so simple. Oh my god, I lived my whole life - oh, no, Lauren, do you think I made Holly this way?
Lauren: Oh, no, hell no. She's the exact opposite. She acts happy when she's really sad.
Val: Well, that's sick.
Lauren: You're both totally screwed up. Hey, now that I've cured you, maybe should pay it forward and help Holly.

Firm, The Mitch: Let me get this straight: you want me to steal files from the firm, turn them over to the FBI, send my colleagues to jail...
Wayne: They roped you into this.
Mitch: Breach attorney-client privilege, thus getting myself disbarred for life, then testify in open court against the Mafia...
Wayne: Well, unfortunately, Mitch...
Mitch: Let me ask you something: are you out of your fucking mind?

Nip Tuck Sean: Check out this bombshell. We're getting ready this morning, and Julia tells me she wants her breasts done.
Christian: If you're thinking conflict of interest, I'd like to volunteer my services.
Sean: Still have a crush on the missus, do we?
Christian: Let the records show that I dated her first and passed off my sloppy seconds to you.

Serial Mom Chip: Hey, dad, have you ever seen Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer?
Eugene: I most certainly have not!

Big Time Rush Kendall: (pushing Jo out of the room) No! No, and let's talk about it on the way to the lobby.
Camille: (to Kendall) Hey, have you seen Logan?
Kendall: Sure...lots of times.

Elf Buddy: Sounds like somebody needs to sing a Christmas carol.
Jovie: Go away.
Buddy: The best way to spread Christmas cheer, is singing loud for all to hear.
Jovie: Thanks, but I don't sing.
Buddy: Oh, well, it's just like talking, except longer and louder, and you move your voice up and down.
Jovie: I can sing, I just choose not to sing. Especially in front of other people.
Buddy: If you can sing alone, you sing in front of other people. There's no difference.
Jovie: Actually, there's a BIG difference.
Buddy: No, there's not. Wait... [Starts singing loud and off-key] I'm singing/I'm in a store/and I'm siiiiiingiiiiing!/I'm in a store/and I'm siiiiiingiiiiing!
Gimbel's Manager: HEY! There's no singin' in the North Pole!
Buddy: Yes, there is!
Gimbel's Manager: No there's not!
Buddy: We sing all the time!
Gimbel's Manager: No you don't!
Buddy: Especially when we build toys! [Back to Jovie] See?

Dexter Angel: [To Masuka] Cause you're like a retarded puppy.

South Park Paris Hilton: Another dog killed itself!